What You Should Know About Men

Note: A step-by-step guide that will help you understand men even better than they understand themselves is available in our course Hidden Secrets To Winning His Heart. After you've completed this course you'll be the most desirable women he's ever met and you'll have a lot more power to get what you want.

1) Men are either attracted or they’re not. If they’re not, you might as well move on to the next prospect. Women can become attracted to a man who initially wasn’t that attractive to her. If he does something that melts her heart she can fall in love in that very moment. An example might be how he treats your mother; if he falls in love with a puppy; if he gets on the ground and plays with a child; or maybe if he cries at a mushy movie. I fell in love with a man who I never would have because he taught my grandson, who was desperately afraid of the water, to swim within a few days.

That doesn’t mean that you can’t do some things to get his attention. If he’s hasn’t really noticed you, then of course, you should keep trying until you know for certain that he’s not interested, or as the book title says, “He’s just not that into you.” A part of this that you should know about men is that they’re kind of scared of the possibility that you will reject them. So if you’re interested in a man, give him clear signals that it’s okay for him to approach you, to ask you out, and to ask you for the next date.

2) Men want to do the pursuing. Men want to be men. They feel like it’s their manly duty to pursue you. They like the chase, they like to do the work to win you over, and they want to feel successful in their pursuit of you. So if you take that away from them, in a way, you’re emasculating them. And you don’t ever, ever want to do that.

That means don’t ask for their phone number, don’t call them except to return their call, don’t ask them out on a date, don’t offer to pay until you’ve become an established couple. This may seem like game playing but it’s not. It’s honoring and respecting their need to be the man. And let me explain something to you. If you take over any part of his job you miss out on how delicious it feels to sit back and be the woman. So many women today have become so strong and capable that they don’t have a clue how wonderful it feels to enjoy being a woman, and how good it feels when you allow yourself to enjoy him being a man.

3) Men are disappointed when you have sex too soon. This may seem like the opposite of everything you know about men, so let me explain. It’s true that most men try to get you into bed as soon as possible. Partly because they can’t help themselves and partly because with each step toward bedding you, there are many opportunities for you to reject him. The quicker he gets past all those possibilities of rejection, the quicker he can relax, knowing that he’s won you over.

On the other side of that drive is his need to respect the woman he’s interested in as a potential mate. If he’s thinking you might be “The One” (which he knows pretty early on) and you have sex too soon, he’ll think, “Darn, I thought she might be the one.” You see, when you have sex too soon he has to take you off of that pedestal he’s dying to put you on. He loses respect for you and he assumes that if you went to bed too soon with him, you do that with other men. Trust me that when you tell him, “I never sleep with a man so soon in a relationship,” he does not believe you. It might be true but he will not believe you because he’s heard it too many times. Sadly, all too often, he’ll write you off as the woman he was looking for. He might be interested enough to continue a relationship with you, maybe for many months, but you will not be put back on that pedestal.

Of course there are exceptions to this but is it worth it? Not if you think he might be the man you’re looking for, “The One.” It’s better to wait. And about that…

4) He needs to respect you. Did you notice that word “needs”? He really does need to respect you. One way to test his respect for you, and his interest, is his willingness to wait to have sex with you. If he is unwilling to wait, how great to find out so quickly that he’s not that interested and he doesn’t respect you enough to care.

Another way a man loses respect for a woman is when she’s crass in her language. And you shouldn’t tolerate that in him, either. He needs you to require him to be respectful of you.

He also needs you to respect him. A man who is 40 years old was brought up in the 60’s but his parents were brought up in a conservative, traditional world. They taught him how a man should be and how a woman should be. The older he is, the more the world around him was conservative and traditional when he was growing up and forming his attitudes towards women and being in a relationship. Men were looked up to, were assumed to be smart, strong and capable. I’m not trying to tell you that the Equal Rights movement didn’t need to happen. What I’m trying to do is explain how a man’s mind works so that you can better negotiate the development of a relationship.

I’m a very modern woman in that I believe I can do anything I set my mind to, I expect the same opportunities as men and it’s not okay to be thought of as less than a man. But I’m old fashioned in that I love feeling taken care of by a man, knowing that he needs that. I love being treated like a lady, having doors opened for me, chairs pulled out for me, and assuming that he’ll pay for dinner and the movie. It feels good. Which leads me to the next thing you need to know about men.

5) He wants to be with a woman who makes him feel like a man. This is the last secret in Men Made Easy and one of the most important, along with the 1st secret, which I’ll talk about below. Let him enjoy being the man. Let him open doors for you, pull your chair out for you, pay for dinner* (see below), seduce you, bring you flowers, call you, work to win your affections. If you’ve never done this, give it a try. You might discover that it feels good to be the woman for a change.

Of course you don’t want to sit back and let him do everything. I understand. The modern woman is a take-charge kind of person. So here’s something you can DO. Give him opportunities to be your hero. He wants to be your hero so why not let him?

You should not be docile, a door mat, weak, or uninteresting. I don’t believe in games. Let him know that you’re smart and capable. At the same time, encourage him to do things for you that require his strength, his problem solving capabilities, and his prowess. It will pay off for you both and he’ll think you’re “one hell of a woman.”

You'll be amazed to learn what you never knew about men and finally understand why it's been so difficult to make things work. Go to Hidden Secrets To Winning His Heart and start transforming your life tonight.

With much love,


The Heart Specialist™