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September 3rd , 2008

This week I've been focusing on creating the new video series I've been promising. It's called Kara's Quick Coaching, to go along with the new coaching program at DatingSuccessTechnology.com. You can learn more about my Quick Coaching program here and the link to the new video is below.

In this issue:
1) 3 Ways To Send The Right Message With Your Appearance
2) X Factor Dating Advice
3) New Dating Advice Video Series On YouTube
4) Over 40, Fit & Fabulous Call Was Lots Of Fun

1) 3 Ways To Send The Right Message With Your Appearance

As I've mentioned before, I've been having fun on Facebook. I'm fascinated to see what poses and attire some women choose for their photos. I'd love to write to them to ask if they are looking for nookie and not friends. If I was a man, I would not think of anything other than nookie.

It got me to thinking that I need to say something to you about what to wear on a date. So here are 3 quick rules:

1) If you're looking for someone to marry or create a long-term relationship with, you need to wear something that is flattering and shows off the best aspects of your figure, but without doing anything suggestive. Don't wear anything that shows cleavage. I'm sorry but the message gets clouded when you're being blatantly s•e•x•ual. And even the most gentlemanly man will be distracted. Besides, you don't want a man to date your bre*asts, you want him dating you, the person within.

2) Don't be too perfectly put together or over the top. The more extreme your attire the more you narrow the number of men who will find you attractive. If you're over 35, you're already dealing with a dwindling number of men who will be interested. So dress flattering but relaxed, feminine, soft, pretty. That doesn't mean ruffles and lace, just be more unstructured. Especially don't wear business attire. He's learned to ignore that the women he works with are female so don't look like what he deals with professionally.

3) Don't be extreme in your hair and make-up. If you wear your hair teased and sprayed, in any kind of a severe style or cut, you are, once again, narrowing the field of possibilities. Keep your hair soft and touchable and your cut flattering and feminine. I used to have ultra short hair and everyone said I looked great in it. It was flattering but severe and striking but not enticing.

The same goes for make-up. The more extreme, the fewer men will be interested. So keep your eye shadow neutral, no blue or purple, certainly not that awful pink that makes a woman look ill. Keep the rouge a natural glow and your lipstick flattering but not too red. Everything should be kissable, not scary. And gloss should not be used or kept at a minimum. Most men say they would not want to get near that "gook" as they call it.

If you're not sure about how you put yourself together, ask a friend or hire a wardrobe consultant. You want to look as fresh, youthful, natural, and fun as possible. If you've gotten in the habit of dressing over the top or at the other end, matronly, it's time for an intervention.

2) X Factor Dating Advice

Tomorrow, I'm going to be interviewed on X Factor Dating. If you're going to be at your computer, you will want to listen in. It's an online radio show that focuses on the advice offered by a wide range of dating and relationship experts. Listen in at 4:30 Pacific Time right here

3) New Dating Advice Video Series On YouTube

As I mentioned above, my new video series is finally ready. Each week I'll be adding one or two lessons. Soon, I'll be offering an SSR feed on my blog so you can be notified when I post a new video. The first lesson is here: Kara's Quick Coaching #1

4) Over 40, Fit & Fabulous Call Was Lots Of Fun

You missed a fun and informative call with Lisa Crisalle last week. Lisa's discussion of her Over 40, Fit & Fabulous program really inspired me so much that I'm already getting back to my old habits of eating right and exercising more. I'm feeling better already and I've lost 2 pounds since last week. Listen here.

From my heart to yours,
Kara

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From my heart to yours,

The Heart Whisperer ^(TM)

Kara Oh
Your Relationship Mentor
Kara's Philosophy

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